Men!

"If you want, I can just do you in the ass."

"Come on, let me fuck your mouth, just don't bite me."

"If you turn over, I'm going to molest your ass."

"I know you've seen porn, you should know how to do this."

"Why don't you get more excited?"

"Oh you are a horny bastard... I just met you 20 minutes ago and look where my hand is now..."

"You didn't get me all the way but you tried."

"What you're doing is weird."

"It could have been worse."

"You're broken."

Why do I let them talk to me like that?? I've only been with two guys. "Alan Rickman" and "The Moron." And yet both of them were so hurtful. I know they're not right. I know I'm not broken. But wow, the more I think about it, the more frustrated with myself I get. I let myself be touched by idiots, I let them do whatever they wanted just because no one else ever had, and then I get to suffer the indignity of listening to them treat me like crap. And I don't even say anything in response. Like my hormones make me deaf. I'm not a feminist per say... but I know what they said isn't right.

They said other things.

"Your lips are amazing."

"I'm in love with your tits."

"You're so soft."

"I don't know what it is you're doing, but it feels sooooo good..."

So I can't be all that bad. Deep down I know I won't be a tragic lover. I just need experience. Time. And someone who doesn't degrade me in the meantime.